66 days

I have a morning off today while Steve and the Moo head over to Masterton. I had an uninterrupted shower (oh bliss!), and meditated on the couch while the rain hammered the roof overhead.

I’m doing the Headspace app/programme, and finally made it past level 3 of the core recordings. That means I’m now free to delve into any of the different packs I choose. I decided to try the Creativity Pack (surprise, surprise) and the focus looks to be on visualisation and expansion. I’m on day 2 of 30 so far, and it’s been really enjoyable.

The meditating has come about after an impulse purchase of one of those Kikki-K habits journals, after I decided I was sick of just thinking about all the things I’d like to do differently. After a bit of workbooking on your goals and dreams, I found myself thinking about what habit, if I took it up, would help me put all of the other changes into play?

I suppose I could have chosen exercise, or yoga, or something else, but meditation, I’ve found, just puts me in the right space to make other good things happen in my day. I’ve got more time for the Mooster, have a better humour, feel more desirous of being productive, eating well, and making others feel good. Every time I’ve done it in the past I’ve thought “I should really do this every day.”

And then I wouldn’t. Cue the 66 days thing. Apparently that is the magic number. Apparently. In any case it’s neat and easy to pick a number and set that as a goal. Ideally I will keep going with meditation far past this date (June 2nd), because I can’t really see any downside to doing it. I love how it feels, love how I am when I do it, and love the idea of making some positive change.

(Other things I’m trying to do this month, and am doing reasonably well at: flossing every night, drinking more water, and eating healthier snacks.)

The Guardian had a really interesting article this week about a band I’d never heard of, The Sound, who were sort of at their heyday in the 80s but got overshadowed by Joy Division and Echo and the Bunnymen. Apparently Adrian Borland wasn’t edgy enough looking (though supposedly no one could top them live for intensity), and the music was too ‘samey’ (though as is pointed out in the article, that Joy Division flavour only feels ubiquitous now because of everyone who tried to do it in the 00s). But seriously. Listen to that track above. Awesome, no?

And Borland looks like a badass in my books:


And their almost-but-not-quite story is even more tragic when you read that Borland killed himself (at 41!) in 1999, and Max Mayers died of AIDS in the early 90s.

Just people, trying to make it. Trying to do what they love.

And these are the ones we hear about. How about all of the other people who have lived, who had a dream, and tried, and failed?

And then gave up?

I see them in black and white, walking around in the rain in wet overcoats, no umbrellas, collars turned up against the cold. Soggy crumpled paper in their pockets. Holes in their shoes.  I’m over here, alive, in colour, sitting at my desk. My heart wants to reach across that wide expanse and clasp their hands in mine.

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